On Being Saved

Imagine there’s a drowning man in a river and he’s helpless. “Save me!” he cries to a passerby. Now, the passerby—the rescuer—feels flattered because we all like to help people. It makes us feel good. We’re proud to play an important role, to save someone who’s in trouble. So the rescuer helps the victim out of the river and goes home, and so does the victim. All live happily ever after in this parable.

However, in the real world, what tends to happen is that someone isn’t actually about to drown; they just think so. They think they’re helpless. And in real life, there are no rescuers. A passerby will help you to some extent, but only to the extent of help they feel comfortable to offer. In the real world, they don’t have the resources to save you. So the help is ultimately insufficient.

In real life, people who allow themselves to play the role of victims, who wait for a rescuer to come along, tend to live unhappily ever after.

In real life, there are no rescuers, but you are not helpless.

Adapted from Rise and Shine: The Extraordinary Story of One Man’s Journey from Near Death to Full Recovery